The fridge broke. It has the peak luxury feature where it dispenses water (both liquid and frozen) from one of its doors. Highest form of hedonism.
However.
One must use caution when using the features the manufacturer claims work and to support.
I found myself craving water with crushed ice in an unnecessarily fancy glass. After filling the glass with said crushed ice, the fridge kept making outrageous racket - even worse than when it was crushing ice.
Confusion. I unplugged it and plugged it back into the wall - racket continues.
I finally call tech support, and after describing the issue I am presented with the following recommendation:
Unplug the fridge from the wall for 48 hours. It needs to perform a restart.
Why the fuck does my fridge need a “restart”??? This is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve heard this year - not because it needs to unfreeze or not because the condensation needs to evaporate, no - it needs a restart.
I’m not dunking on the customer care rep, I’m sure it is the first thing they suggest. Hell, I’ve interacted with computers a couple of times and restart is often the best solution.
BUT A FRIDGE SHOULD NOT BE A COMPUTER! And I’m not talking about those stupid SmartThings AI fridges. Mine is just a fridge.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.